


One World's Tragedy is Another World's ...Gain?

by Foodmoon



Series: Oddball fics [21]
Category: Dragonriders of Pern - Anne McCaffrey, Naruto
Genre: Fluff and Crack, Gen, Idk will add tags later, Internal contemplations, M/M, Multi, Post-Kakashi as Rokudaime AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-14 01:43:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17499242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Foodmoon/pseuds/Foodmoon
Summary: Pern goes to hell in a handbasket. Ir'ca tries to rescue the future of dragonkind by being a thief and somehow ends up in the Land of Fire. It's probably a good thing Kakashi handed over the Hat a while back...





	1. Rescue Flight

**Author's Note:**

> I give up. Apparently my muse is _very, very attached_ to wanting to write dragons in conjunction to Kakashi at the moment.  
>  _(Apologies to those of you who saw the short-lived other Kakashi+Iruka+dragons fic I posted briefly. I honestly didn’t care that much for how it came out, and the last scene was certainly not intended to come out that close to Taudi’s fic, which served as inspiration for the scene. (Only the fact of a captive dragon and the dialogue was supposed to be similar, not the other details. I’d like to emphasize ‘similar’ here, because I think only about four words were the same.) I have occasional memory issues, and it was my fault for not double checking before I started writing. I may rework the rest of the idea at some point, but don’t hold your breath.)_  
>  Anyways~ So since my muse has been going ‘dragons _dragons_ dragons’ rather annoyingly for a week or two now… I came across some apparently abandoned Pern/Naruto crossovers a few days ago, with Kaka/Iru as dragonriders in Pern. Which reminded me of my pet peeve with this snip of prophecy somewhere in the series about ‘dragon rising against dragon something something’ to the effect that the dragons would have a battle royale at some point and wipe themselves out completely. Okay, I read initially the series like twenty years ago and the last few books maybe a decade ago, so the only reason I remember _that_ is that it pissed me off. A lot. Cuz really? _No fucking point. At all._ No one needs oracular tragedy bullshit that just is the author’s way of saying _‘mine, not sharing’_.

Ir’ca, formerly Iranthca, is currently stealing eggs. Or more precisely _rescuing_ eggs, but technically it’s still stealing. He winces at the screams of injured and dying dragons fighting outside, tightens the wrap around the smallest of the eggs chosen, scrambles onto Naruth’s back and flashes _between_ with his precious cargo before anyone can notice his presence.

He’d heard once from an old, old bard that there was an ancient prophecy about dragon rising against dragon until they no longer filled the skies, but never in his worst nightmares had he imagined it was _true,_ or that if it was it would be to _this_ extent. The first egg he’d rescued had been a queen egg from his own weyr. Ir’ca had come upon other dragon riders committing the ultimate abomination of smashing the eggs from the recent nesting. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the horror, to how the madness spreads between weyrs, infecting even the most level-headed or simply drawing them in to defend what is theirs from the maddened ones. No real reason at all that he and his blue Naruth have been spared. Fortunately, Naruth was small enough that he’d been able to swoop in to snatch the queen egg mere moments before it met a like fate, flashing _between_ a split second before claws and weapons could reach them.

It was only luck that they hadn’t thought of searching through time for him, as he hadn’t _dared_ stay _between_ for more than an instant, and a true miracle that the icy chill of _between_ hadn’t killed the precious egg. When he’d come out the other side, the devastation was a week old, all the other eggs broken and rotting, the weyr filled with corpses, the aggressors all dead or gone.

Staying here, in his ruined home weyr is risky, _heart-breaking_ , but it’s unlikely that anyone will search through a ruined weyr for eggs to destroy. He has 23 eggs rescued now, an entire clutch’s worth, and a full five of them are queen eggs, and Ir’ca knows he can’t afford to rescue more. Even Naruth has admitted reluctantly that he doesn’t know if he can safely transport more at a time if they have to evacuate to one of their equally unsafe backup hiding spots. Not only that, but a number of the eggs are getting close to hatching, and there’s the matter of where to find enough candidates, particularly _queen_ candidates, to bond to the precious hatchlings so that they don’t simply commit suicide for lack of a bond. He’s yet to find a surviving weyrling from ruined weyrs and doesn’t dare risk drawing attention to his theft of eggs by trying to recruit or simply snatching weyrlings from the ones that aren’t yet ruined.

Ir’ca slides down and checks their precious cargo, getting Naruth’s help to situate the eggs properly to the others, and double checking wrappings and bindings to make certain they can be lashed together as a unit at a moment’s notice if evacuation is required. Fortunately they’ve been able to salvage enough foodstuffs from other ruined weyrs to feed Naruth without leaving evidence of a survivor near their own weyr, and enough to keep Ir’ca fed for years without contact with others.

He curses as he notices that the first queen egg is undoubtedly mere hours from hatching. Apparently he’s going to have to risk snatching some weyrlings after all.

 *Fight coming this way. Bronzes, browns, two queens.* Naruth informs him, sounding anxious.

Ir’ca curses again and hurriedly starts lashing the eggs together for transport. It takes longer, far longer, than he’d like and the fighting is directly above the weyr before he’s done. He takes a few moments to secure his emergency stash on Naruth’s back before mounting, far too aware that he may not be able to return here. As he fixes their destination in his mind, fighting dragons collide with the rock hosting the weyr, shuddering it like a small earthquake, and a rock falls from the roof of the hatching grounds, hitting Ir’ca’s head as they flash _between_ , scrambling the image in his mind. But he _cannot afford to die, not with the future of all the weyrs with him,_ so he determinedly clings to the most important parts of the image: _warm, safe, queen candidate nearby._

 _Between_ doesn’t feel like the normal icy void, not with waves of nausea rolling through him, his injury giving the illusion of forcing their way through veils of existence with each successive wave of fiery nausea, making his stomach lurch and scraping at his frail grasp on their destination image. It feels like eternity has passed when they finally emerge on the other side, though he knows that at best it’s been seconds.

 *Different.* is Naruth’s only comment as Ir’ca slides down and wretches miserably.

“Maa, maa, I’ve never seen a summons like you, but if you’d like to move off of me while your summoner gets his belly under control, I’d be much obliged.”

Ir’ca jerks his head up in surprise, then promptly goes back to throwing up, unable to deal with anything more at the moment. He can hear Naruth obligingly shuffling around and feel his curiosity. About the time his stomach decides to quit trying to turn itself inside out, he hears the man speak again.

“Thanks. What’s your name?”

 *Naruth.*

He turns to stare. It’s not often that Naruth bothers to reply to anyone besides him. The man that they had apparently landed on has a wild shock of silver hair, but appears to be only a few years older than Ir’ca himself. He’s dressed in a fashion that Ir’ca has no reference for, and appears to be unharmed by the mishap that could well have been lethal.

“Narut? Saa, that sounds a lot like the name of my knuckleheaded student. He’s called Naruto. I’m Kakashi, by the way. What’s in these? Rocks? They’re certainly heavy enough to be.” Kakashi pokes at the wrapped eggs curiously.

 *Eggs.*

“Oh, eggs? No wonder they’re wrapped so well. Never seen eggs this big before, but I suppose if all your species gets to your size it’s little wonder.”

“Wait. You can understand him?” Ir’ca blurts in shock.

 Kakashi turns to look at him in patent surprise, which is quite a trick, given that he only has one eye visible between the odd headgear and the mask he wears. “I’ve never met a summons _incapable_ of speech. Is there some reason I shouldn’t understand him? You must’ve been in quite a hurry to go through a summons with a concussion.”

Ir’ca finally places the manner. The man holds himself like a seasoned dragon rider or watchman, secure enough in his skills to feel no need to boast or bluster, but alert and ready to spring into action at need despite his ubiquitous slouch. His innocuous comment holds the questions: _‘Are you harmless to my people? And do I need to prepare for pursuers?’_

“I am Ir’ca, rider of blue Naruth. We traveled here via _between_ , I’m not sure what this ‘summons’ you speak of is, and those who might have thought to pursue us were probably too busy fighting to notice our presence, much less our departure. A rock fell on me as we went _between._ But even had that not been the case, we would have come, because once they finished fighting, any survivors would likely have searched the weyr and destroyed the eggs, and I- we couldn’t let that happen.”

 *Different.* Naruth comments again, then uncharacteristically clarifies, *Different world. Not Pern.*

“I- He- _What-!?”_ Ir’ca demands.

 *Eggs different now, too.* Naruth offers, sounding about as sheepish as a dragon can manage.

Horror washes through Ir’ca. “Different? Different how? Did they-? Are they-?”

“Maa, maa, calm down. Chakra sensing isn’t my _best_ thing, but even I can tell there’s still life in your eggs, now that I’m looking. I don’t know what this _between_ of yours is, but if you accidentally got pulled into our world like a summons, I’d say at worst the eggs have adapted to this world and the hatchlings may be able to use chakra.”

“I- You- You seem rather calm about us being possibly from another world?”

Kakashi makes a lazy wave off gesture. “Saa, it happens. After fighting an alien goddess, an undead madman, and sentient plants and getting resurrected, it’s kind of hard to get excited about little things, Iruka.”

It takes him a moment to realize that ‘Iruka’ is how this man heard his name. He considers correcting him, because the contracted name is the pride of all dragon riders, but decides it isn’t worth bothering with. More concerning is just how calmly this Kakashi just spouted those improbabilities at him. Either he’s _crazy_ or this world is a bit- _more than a bit-_ concerning! Not to mention…

“What is ‘chakra’?”

~

Kakashi lies qualmlessly. After Kaguya and her erstwhile underlings and servants and several of her crazed descendants _(and wasn’t that a kick in the pants that several of the most feared and respected ninja clans are actually **descended** from the alien goddess?)_ someone showing up from ‘another world’ or dimension on the back of a massive, telepathic summons and apparently fleeing a war is hardly a _little_ concern.

Iruka gives him a baffled look that clearly questions his sanity, then asks, “What is ‘chakra’?”

He gives the man with the thin scar across the bridge of his nose a long look, but he can’t detect any deceit in the dark eyes, only uncertainty and worry. “Well, you could say it’s a combination of physical energy and spiritual energy, shaped by the will into jutsus, which can do various things like this-” Kakashi lets the merest crackle of lightning coat his hand in demonstration, before letting it die. “Or this.” This time he makes a shadow clone, enjoying the startlement of both man and summons. Then he asks casually, “Is that egg alright? It seems to be rocking rather insistently.”

Cursing, Iruka dives for the eggs, hastily unlashing them from each other, Narut helpfully separating each one as it is parted, until Iruka reaches the egg that’s shaking itself in a tenacious manner, and Narut drags it further from the others. Iruka starts peeling off layers of wrapping, still cursing.

“Is there a problem?” He asks curiously.

 *Queen egg hatching.* Narut offers.

“Yes, there’s a shards bedamned problem! I don’t have any meat to feed her, and _that_ won’t even matter, because if I can’t find someone to bond with her, she’ll commit suicide for lack of a bond!”

Kakashi frowns and silently signals his clone to go hunt some prey down. If nothing else, he can at least provide meat for the hatchling.

“Naruth? Can you sense _any_ potential queen riders at all?” Iruka demands, sounding a bit frantic.

The summons tilts its head curiously, then nudges a startled Kakashi towards the egg and Iruka. *Lightning hair.*

Iruka yanks the last layer of insulation away and turns with startled-wide, hopeful eyes.

“Maa, maa, I don’t think-”

 _“Please!?_ She’ll _die_ if you don’t, if you can’t! She’s the last survivor from my weyr. _Please.”_

Kakashi sighs. He’s always been weak to puppy eyes and the plight of orphaned creatures. “Saa, I guess…”

_His food budget is definitely going to regret this, he can tell already._

~

Her name is Rinze, and Kakashi is baffled by the sheer, unmitigated love she offers him and awed by the massive amount she can consume in one sitting. _(He’s fairly sure she could give even Hinata a run for her money in an eating contest.)_ His first clone is out hunting _another_ quarry, while a second is helping Iruka slaughter the beasts so that the little dragon won’t choke on any bones, and a third is handing him pieces of meat to feed her, because she doesn’t want anyone except _him_ close right now and almost took a chunk out of Iruka the first time he tried. All of them are a bit tired and covered in blood at this point.

 _A dragon! Dragons!_ So unlike the concept of dragons familiar to his culture; he’s never even _heard_ of one of this type before, but he’s hardly going to argue with a beast the size of a cottage over its chosen terminology.

Finally, Rinze quits crying for more meat, and hunkers down with a bulging stomach, eyes slowly drifting shut.

“So… Dragons.”

Iruka eyes him with an expression of mixed relief and worry. “They grow fast during this stage. When they’re grown they only need to hunt once or twice a week. Do you think you can cover her with some of the wrappings from the egg?” He glances up at the lowering sun briefly. “It’s a bit too cool to be healthy for her at this age.”

“Hm.” He stoops and grabs a wrapping, shaking it out thoughtfully. “Actually… We shouldn’t stay here longer. The local predators have been keeping their distance because they’re wary of Narut, but that will change with nightfall. This isn’t called the Forest of Death for no reason.”

His clones help him bundle up Rinze carefully.

Narut starts dragging the other separated eggs back together while Iruka splutters. “But Rinze! She doesn’t have the stamina to make it very far yet!”

“Maa, maa, just take care of the eggs. I’ll take care of Rinze.”

Looking like he wants to rant at him, Iruka huffs, but apparently knows the value of listening to someone with local knowledge, and obediently goes over and starts lashing the bundled eggs back together meticulously.

_He does so like a man who listens._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The names. Kakashi and Ir’ca are pronouncing the names differently because Ir’ca’s culture has some sounds that Kakashi’s culture does _not_ use, such as the ‘th’ in ‘Naruth’. Kakashi’s culture also doesn’t contract names in quite that manner, and Ir’ca sounds quite a bit like ‘Iruka’. So Naruth and Ir’ca are becoming Narut and Iruka when it’s Kakashi’s pov. At least for now.
> 
> Naruth is correct that tripping into Naruto world changed things about the dragons. For one thing, no more of this perpetually getting larger with each generation bit. By this point, even the ‘small’ dragons are massive. No need to make them end up as behemoths that accidentally break planets by sneezing too hard.
> 
> (flails) I have a few more ideas for this, but not really anything that requires writing, so I may end up just adding more notes instead of more chapters.


	2. Beginnings of a Lair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi experiences _between_. Iruka and Naruth meet some Konoha ninjas. A lair/weyr gets built. Kakashi whines.
> 
> Also, reallly long notes. Feel free to skip them if you want.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Pernese terms~**  
>  **Dragons** : Developed via bioengineering from _firelizards_ native to Pern in desperation by the stranded colonists when Pern was found to be threatened by _thread_ , which canonically has been permanently dealt with many hundreds of years later and no longer a threat to Pern. While they started off around the size of a horse (more or less), they were designed so each successive generation grew larger. Telepathic. Empathic. While human intelligent, they don’t really think like humans (canonical). While they can access _between_ like their progenitor cousins, the _firelizards,_ they don’t hold their own mental images for destinations, but access whatever image their rider is holding in their mind. They can also pick up images from others with psi capabilities (canonical), however it is rare for a dragon to attempt to communicate with someone other than their rider (canonical), though they speak with other dragons and to some extent even _firelizards_ (canonical).  
> Pernese dragons have faceted eyes that swirl with multiple colors that tend to reflect their mood. They do not have scales, instead having skin that, if I recall correctly, feels something similar to suede. Dragonhide can shift shade somewhat in response to breeding cycle, giving riders some warning before mating flights occur. Injured dragons bleed a greenish substance known as ichor.  
> Dragon types:  
>  **Gold** \- Female. Also known as queens, they are the largest of all dragons and can clutch dragons of any color. They can clutch up to more than twenty eggs at a time, and are very broody while waiting for their clutches to hatch.  
>  **Bronze** \- Male. The largest of male dragons. (Usually weyrleaders are bronze or brown riders.)  
>  **Brown** \- Male. Second largest of male dragons.  
>  **Blue** \- Male. Smaller and more agile than golds, bronzes and browns. (Usually blues or browns mate green dragons.)  
>  **Green** \- Female. The smallest and most agile of dragons. They can only clutch brown, blue or green dragons, regardless of mate. While more motherly than their _firelizard_ counterparts, greens have a reputation for being feckless and lacking maternal instincts.  
>  _Runts or sports (canonical)-_ Generally these die in the shell. Even those who survive long enough to reach hatching stage _rarely_ meet attempts to help them hatch if they’re not strong enough to hatch on their own. As such, they are practically unheard of within dragon ranks. Dead/dud eggs are generally disposed of in _between._
> 
>  ** _Between_** : An endless, icy void that _firelizards_ and dragons use to travel between places in mere seconds. While in it, there is no sensation other than absolute cold and utter timelessness. It can also be used to time travel. Dragons can carry riders and anything they’re touching or holding _between_ as well. Given that they can physically carry the weight. _(Canonically dragons were used to rescue most of the belongings of a hold about to be swamped by a tsunami.)_ Using _between_ when the rider has no image in mind results in both dragon and rider forever lost in _between_ , unclear images can result in such mishaps as materializing inside a boulder. Needless to say, using _between_ can be lethally hazardous.
> 
> Firestone (canonical): Mineral chewed by _firelizards_ and dragons alike to flame _thread_. Gold dragons were never allowed to chew it because it causes temporary infertility in female dragons. For this reason it was thought for many hundreds of years that green dragons are infertile, however that is not the case if they abstain from chewing firestone prior to a mating flight until clutching.

Kakashi decides that while _between_ is certainly handy, kamui is _far_ less nerve-wracking and less likely to end up in lethal frostbite. Not that he can _use_ kamui anymore, but he can’t think of a good reason dragons wouldn’t be able to learn to use it. _Right?_ Either way, he’s not going _between_ again unless the world is ending again. He shivers hard and circulates his chakra to make sure he doesn’t lose any appendages.

Somehow he’s not at all surprised when his unwanted guards promptly show up, along with a few jounin investigating the sudden source of chakra. And just as promptly freeze when they see the oversized claws wrapped around his waist delicately. He slights Rinze’s weight on his shoulder a bit to free a hand and gives them a little wave. “Yo.”

“Rokudaime-sama, will you _please_ quit losing your guards just to amuse yourself?”

“You’re a _lord!?”_ Iruka blurts, a note of horror in his tone.

“Maa, maa, I’m retired, not dead, Tenzo. Besides, if they can’t keep up with one poor, retired ninja, they need more training anyways, ne?”

“Rokudaime- _sama_ , will you please quit addressing me by name when I’m on duty?” Tenzo sounds beleaguered.

Kakashi eye-smiles at him. “Of course, Tenzo.”

The sound of strangled frustration is music to his ears.

“Nin-ja?” Iruka sounds puzzled.

It occurs to him that _possibly_ the dimension Iruka and Narut come from doesn’t _have_ ninja, as inexplicable as that seems. Then again, without chakra, samurai and street thugs would serve similar purposes, so maybe it’s understandable. However, he’s feeling a bit too lazy to bother explaining the concept properly. He can get Sakura to do it later.

“People who can use chakra.” He replies, only slightly mendaciously. “Iruka, this is Tenzo and some bodyguards the village insists on for no good reason. Tenzo, this is Iruka…” He remembers the nose scar that reminds him of a dolphin he saw on a mission, and cheerfully fabricates a surname for the man. “Umino and his companion, the blue dragon Narut. They’re extra-dimensional travelers. Isn’t it wonderful?”

Tenzo makes an aggrieved sound reminiscent of a dying cat and removes his mask to glare more effectively. “Senpai, you are a horrible, horrible person. And considering our _last_ set of interdimensional travelers tried to kill everyone and nearly succeeded, I _don’t_ think it’s particularly wonderful. And you shouldn’t either, considering you were one of the people who _died_.”

“Maa, maa, but I’m alive now, so it’s all good. Besides, isn’t Rinze cute?” He holds out the bundled up little queen who opens her eyes sleepily, then yawns, showcasing her sharp little teeth. Okay, for a given value of ‘little’.

Judging by the looks on the jounins’ faces, they don’t agree with his assessment of ‘little’ in this case, particularly in close proximity to him. Right up until Naruth snakes his head down to almost touch Tenzo’s chest, and remarks, *Eggs need warm place soon. Where?*

Tenzo pales, but to his credit doesn’t faint or retreat or use his Mokuton. “I’m…not certain. Senpai?”

“I thought we could hastily repurpose one of the old Root bases for now. There seems to be enough bored jounin about to make it feasible, ne?” Kakashi informs him with obnoxious cheer. From their body language, the ANBUs and jounins look like they’re regretting showing up. All but Tenzo; Tenzo’s eyes light up.

“Which one?”

_Oh, right, there were three, weren’t there? Hm…_

“The closest one.” The dragons are probably better off closer to the Forest of Death, where they can hunt freely. It also happens to be the one he knows was thoroughly cleaned of traps by ANBU trainees before he handed over the Hat to Naruto. There’s some structural damage, but some doton and mokuton can deal with that easily enough. The heating, though. That’s a problem. He doesn’t think any civilians can be convinced to come near enough to the dragons to properly wire electricity, and it’s not in the general ninja skill set. _Oh well, there’s always seals, and he’s sure it won’t take much to convince Naruto to help him modify some heating seals for the purpose._

~

Late that night, Naruth raises his head at the sound of quiet rustling in the vicinity of the still-wrapped eggs, peering into the dark. This wood and stone weyr is a strange thing. Comfortable enough for all that it had been raised in half a day. Not _finished_. Lightning hair _~~Kakashi~~_ had said it might take a week to be actually finished. But adequate. The _ninjas_ had even managed to provide temporary heat for the eggs with their _chakra._ Heat that would have to be renewed every morning and evening, and not quite warm enough to justify removing the wrappings, but sufficient to keep the eggs from harm as long as they remained warmly wrapped. Still, he is unfamiliar with the dangers of this world.

_Huh. Not a threat after all._

He lowers his head and goes back to quietly keeping watch over the hodgepodge remnants they’ve rescued to make up this precious clutch.

Beside him, Ir’ca doesn’t stir. He hasn’t told his rider, but it wasn’t delusions from the concussion that he’d experienced. They had spent far longer in _between_ than they should have, and been pulled through pieces of _between_ that shouldn’t have been possible to travel through. The nausea had been more from passing through several _realities_ to reach this world than the mild concussion.

He has no intention of telling his worrywart rider, either.

_Better to let him sleep._

In the morning, Naruth will have to go hunting, but for now he’ll just make sure no threats approach his rider or the clutch. _At least he knows queen rider Lightning Hair will keep Rinze safe._

 _Another thing to not inform his rider of. All the potential candidates they’ve met so far are highly trained killers._ He hopes they won’t all be, but for now, he’s glad of it. There are few things dangerous enough in this world, from the thoughts he’s touched, to get past Lightning Hair to be a threat to Rinze.

 _Rinze. How curious. It should have been Rinzeth, according to all he knows, and yet…_ Well, a dragon knows their name from hatching. It suits her, and the humans of this world don’t seem to be able to properly produce the _‘th’_ endings to names, so perhaps it’s for the best.

~

Kakashi has never been more thrilled to have the ability to make shadow clones than he is now. The clones had taken care of feeding Rinze every couple hours when his body had demanded sleep. Rinze doesn’t want others near her just yet, but she seems to be okay with his clones. And now, while he hates to leave her for even a moment, he needs to go work with Naruto on permanent heat seals for the newly made _weyr,_ a word he has trouble wrapping his tongue around.

 _The sacrifices he makes!_ But it’s worth it.

As glad as he is to not be Hokage anymore, it’s been a bit boring with having his ANBU guards still following him around. _Tsunade_ doesn’t have to deal with this, so he fails to see why Naruto insists on it. He darkly suspects that Tenzo is at the root of this inconvenience. Whatever the case, it means that he really doesn’t get anything except diplomatic missions anymore, and those are usually _boring_ now that Naruto has Talk no Jutsued everyone into peace.

But someone from another dimension and _dragons,_ well, that alone is entertaining enough to make the effort worth it. _And Rinze._ Rinze is more than worth it, entirely on her own. The fact that he now has new and relatively amusing ways to make people miserable is just a _very, very nice_ bonus.

~

The _weyr_ is completed just in time for the next egg to show imminent signs of hatching, much to Iruka’s relief. _(Ir’ca is resigned by now to being called Iruka, and is fairly sure that none of the new dragon riders will consent to the contracted names he is used to, given the way their language apparently works. And why he can mostly understand and speak their language is another question, but not one he’s willing to think too hard on.)_

They have determined that nearly anyone with an active _chakra_ system is a potential candidate, including pre-genin who are still learning how to properly use their chakra. There are, however, notable exceptions.

The _lord holder_ , Naruto, is sulking openly at being told that he cannot be a candidate. Not only because of his position, but also, according to Naruth, because he already _has_ two bonds. Which shouldn’t be _possible._

“Maa, maa, Naruto. He’s not trying to pick on you. He said Sakura-chan and Sasuke and Tsunade aren’t eligible either, because they have bonds too. It’s hardly his fault that you have a contract with the Toads and Kurama to boot.” Kakashi says from where he’s leaning against a thick wooden wall, ostentatiously reading some bright colored book that Iruka is fairly sure he doesn’t want to know what it is about.

“But- But- You have a contract with your dogs!”

“Saa, apparently minor summons contracts don’t interfere. But I think you’ll find anyone with a major contract or a sage summons contract isn’t eligible. Also, Rinze tried to eat Pakkun. Pakkun wasn’t very pleased.”

“Fine!” Naruto throws up his hands dramatically. “But we’re calling this a lair instead of that weird foreign word no one can pronounce!”

“Maa, maa, I can pronounce _weyr._ ” Kakashi contradicts in an amused tone. Iruka gets the distinct impression that he’s just messing with his former student, but he does do a fair job of pronouncing it.

Naruto points at Kakashi rudely. “Overruled! Not everyone is a genius like you, Kakashi-sensei! Dattebayo!”

His white-eyed, but not blind, wife giggles softly.

“Tch. Dobe.” His dark haired, broody friend comments.

“So that would mean that Orochimaru and Anko aren’t eligible either, right? How about the Academy students and genin?” The pink haired healer asks thoughtfully.

“Usually Candidates are between 8 and 12 when _Searched_ , and it’s fairly rare that someone over 16 is _Impressed.”_ Iruka tells her, glad to have something of an answer for _this_ question, at least.

The blonde woman who looks twenty, but whom Naruth informs him is closer to sixty, uncrosses her arms. “It’s probably better to start with the older candidates. Parents may be okay with their children becoming ninjas, but dragons are an entirely different matter, and it will take time for people to become more comfortable with the idea. We can call in the genin if one of the dragons doesn’t…er… _Impress?_ on one of the current candidates.”

Iruka nods. These people have no established system of dealing with dragons, so it’s a fair point. However, he’s fairly sure that all these _chakra_ active people are the guards among their people. “The dragonets won’t be able to fly right away and it will be several years before they will be grown enough to fight properly. In my lifetime, we’ve had _dragonholds_ so the _weyrs_ have been self-sufficient and can be called upon for quick transport or extra protection if needed by surrounding holds in return for payment or favors. If that doesn’t work… Um. Historically the _weyrs_ were self-governing and the surrounding holds paid tithes in protection from _Threadfall.”_

Sakura, the pink haired healer gives him a sharp look. The lazy looking man with spikey hair, slouching beside her, says, “So what you’re saying is that you think the lairs should be self-governing so they can’t be used at the whim of political factions?”

He shrugs a bit helplessly. “Yes? It’s worked for many centuries, and I don’t even know where I’d begin with something different, quite honestly.”

“Troublesome.”

“Not a bad idea, though.” The blonde Tsunade remarks. “Things could get…tense if the dragons were under the Daimyo or under Konoha. I think we’d all prefer to avoid that kind of scenario?”

Naruto perks up. “I can square it with the Daimyo. He wants peace and everything, so it shouldn’t be hard.”

The long haired blue-eyed blonde woman who has been poking at the wrappings on the eggs, looks up and asks bluntly, “And who would be in charge of this self-governing entity? You?”

Iruka winces. “No, no. Historically, the rider of the first queen to rise in a mating flight in a _weyr_ is the _weyrlady._ And the rider of whichever dragon manages to mate the queen is the new _weyrleader_. Um. There’s never been a male queenrider before, but… Well, it will probably be Kakashi, since Rinze is the oldest queen and likely to rise first. And, er, the rider of whichever dragon flies her. Which will likely be a bronze or brown.”

Kakashi drops his book. _“What!?”_

“Err… Is that a problem?”

“I already _retired_ from being in charge!” Kakashi whines plaintively.

Iruka feels his lips twitch in amusement.

Sasuke smirks.

Everyone else flat out laughs or cackles.

“There’s no one I’d trust more with being lair-lady, Kakashi-sensei!” Naruto declares grandly.

Kakashi droops in a dramatic sulk and stoops to retrieve his book. “My cute little genin are picking on me!”

He huffs in amusement. “Didn’t you all come here to help me unwrap the eggs now that the heat seal is properly placed?”

“Saa, Rinze is hungry.” Kakashi excuses himself promptly, the book vanishing into his weapon’s pouch, and disappears with a puff of smoke, leaving only a twirling leaf behind.

Naruto laughs. “Kakashi-sensei is still such a slacker. Dattebayo! Don’t worry, we’ll get it done before you know it!”

Iruka takes a moment to wonder if he should hope one of the other queens ends up rising before Rinze. Then he remembers that the man is the former _lord holder_ and since this hold apparently selects its leaders based on ability, there’s no real doubt that he’s up to the job. _Even if he pretends otherwise._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People with chakra can feasibly bond with a dragon. This is a change from Pern, where hearing dragons requires a certain amount of psi gifts. Why? Because psi gifts isn’t really a concept in Naruto-verse, _and dragons without a bond suicide,_ so being chakra-active is the closest equivalent. Thus the change that allows the dragons to survive and thrive. Understandably, Ir’ca is startled by the rather large number of people who can now understand dragons.
> 
> People with major summons contracts, including sage summons such as the toads, snakes and slugs, cannot bond with a dragon because the contract is perceived as a preexisting bond to dragons. _(Presumably this would also apply to jinchuurikis.)_ Thus the following characters will NOT be getting a dragon of their own for that reason only:  
>  _Naruto, Sasuke, Anko, Orochimaru, Sakura, Tsunade, (other characters may be included in this list)._
> 
> Lair: What Naruto emphatically changes the term _weyr_ to, because of the difficulty in pronouncing the word.
> 
> Hatching grounds: Stone floor heated by a permanent heat seal designed for the purpose, and covered with a layer of sandy soil. (Naruto-verse)


	3. Lots of Hatching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of the eggs hatch, though not all at the same time. Various povs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Pernese terms~**   
>  _(Since I’m writing from the Naruto fandom). If you’re unfamiliar with Naruto, you can easily google anything that puzzles you. I know, because I do it allll the time when writing.)_   
>  **Also:**   
>  _Some of you may notice some of the terms are a little different or lack the variety of canon terms. Partly this is because I just pulled everything out of memory instead of looking it up. The other part is that Ir'ca comes from a few hundred years post-canon. After Thread has been defeated, and the dragons have spread out over the planet. As their purpose within Pernese life has shifted somewhat and the big weyrs are largely a thing of the past, some of the terms have also shifted or blurred._
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  Weyr: Run by a weyrlady and weyrleader, a weyr is both the physical structure (including the dragon lairs, living quarters for non-riders and riders, hatching grounds, etc) and as a whole all the people and dragons who live in or technically belong to the weyr. Generally weyrs are cliffside cave complexes, either natural or carved.  
> In general, a hunting grounds is attached to a weyr so the weyr can be largely self-sufficient. However, a weyr is supported by tithes from the Holds it protects; such tithes are far more grudgingly given in times where there’s no large menace to protect the populace from (canonical, historical).  
> Canonically, the weyr is a lot more flexible on sexuality and such than the general populace.  
> Termwise, it also refers to a dragon’s personal living space. May include the rider’s attached personal living space too.
> 
> Hatching grounds: Heated sands where clutches of eggs are laid and hatched. Something geothermal something or other… (canonical).
> 
> Weyrlady: Female (canonically) leader of the weyr, queen rider or senior queen rider if the lair has more than one queen. Green riders can also be weyrlady, but only in absence of a weyr having a queen rider. If a weyrlady dies or retires, the rider of the next queen dragon to rise in a mating flight is the next weyrlady. Weyrs without gold/queen dragons default to green rider weyrladies by the same process.
> 
> Weyrleader: The rider of the dragon who mates the weyrlady. Male (canonically) leader of the weyr. Usually also the weyrlady’s lover, but other arrangements _can_ be made. Because dragons compete in mating flights, who is weyrleader can change even when the weyrlady is the same person. In the absence of a weyrleader, such as if the senior queen is too young to mate yet, the former weyrleader is interim weyrleader.
> 
> Weyrmate: A long term sexual pairing within a weyr, or defacto marriage between dragon riders. It’s rare that others try to come between known pairings, even if one of the pair’s dragon mates with a different dragon during a mating flight. Some riders change weyrmates with mating flights, others don’t. The term may also be used to refer to marriages of those living in the weyr who aren’t riders.
> 
> Weyrling: A child born in/raised in the weyr. Mostly they are the children of riders or support staff. They tend to have enough psi gift (canonically) in their bloodline to be adequate candidates for hatchling dragons to bond to. However, it is the dragon who chooses, and having the qualification for it doesn’t mean that they’ll be chosen.
> 
> Lord Holder (canonical): Ruler of an estate/holding. Holdings can range from rather small to vast. Lord Holders hold power similar to a weyrleader or head of a guild/hall.
> 
> Guild halls (canonical): In charge of all those of particular professions rather than territory and the residents thereof. For instance, Harper Hall is in charge of education, music, and preserving history. Bards of any rank can be found throughout the holdings and weyrs of Pern. They may travel or be employed, but ultimately they answer to the guild/hall they belong to.

While Sai is curious about the dragons, he doesn’t quite understand why Beautiful insisted on dragging him along to watch a single egg hatch. Other than Narut’s deep humming and Rinze’s thin attempt at humming, it’s really no different than watching an oversized bird egg hatch. However, he is used to his wife’s odd whims by now, so he obediently stands and watches. He less understands Iruka-san’s faintly disappointed look when a blue dragonet tumbles out of the egg with an indignant sound, as if personally offended by the fall. Iruka-san has a blue dragon himself, so why should a blue dragon hatching be a disappointment? Is there something wrong with it? Is the newborn’s clumsiness a defect?

The hatchling makes an indignant, demanding sound so like Beautiful’s when she wants something _now_ that he steps forward without hesitation, instinctively answering the demand. The little blue makes a startled sound that reminds him vividly of Beautiful’s _‘Aha, that’s where you are!’_ sound and waddles towards him with surprising speed.

_*I am Hanshin. I am hungry.*_

Sai blinks. “He says his name is Hanshin, and that he’s hungry.”

Iruka beams at him. “Go ahead and feed him. Dragonets eat a _lot_.”

He blinks again. “Why me? Shouldn’t his rider be the one to feed him?”

Beautiful smacks him lightly upside the head and hands him a large basin full of bloody meat strips. _“You_ are his rider. That’s why he told you his name. Now feed the poor thing before he starves to death!”

 _Oh._ He had not known that. Gingerly, he takes a strip out of the basin and holds it out. Hanshin snatches it out of his hand, teeth just missing his fingers, and pushes a wave of emotion at Sai that takes him a long moment to parse as _affection_. Perhaps this is the reason sensei-sama seems so content at having to take care of a demanding dragon-child?

 _*More*_ Hanshin demands, impatient at his pause in feeding. _Odd, he doesn’t remember Inojin being this demanding when he learned to talk._ Still, he starts feeding the dragonet again, because he’s unsure if starvation at this stage is a real possibility or not. _Who knew with dragons, after all? Newborn humans had to be fed every few hours, so it would make sense._

~

Ino grimaces to herself and makes a note to talk to Inojin and her mother. Because unlike her husband, she has actually paid attention to Iruka’s explanations of dragon mating habits and what effects that has on the riders. _No way in hell is some other woman getting a chance at her husband._ Or man, though she supposes that she _might_ be okay with sharing in that case.

Still, _no._ Which means that Inojin is going to need someone with enough time and energy to properly take care of him, if both of his parents end up as riders. Her mother complains about not getting to spend enough time with Inojin anyways.

~

Norio has heard _rumors_. Rumors about dragons and a nest of eggs waiting to be hatched. As a good spy, he’s only doing his duty when he shows up at the first multi-egg hatch as an unremarkable Konoha chunin. After all, the rumors also say there’s going to be multiple rounds of hatching because the eggs are from different mothers, and it would be to Iwa’s advantage to get his hands on one if it’s feasible. Mostly, he’s checking to see if it _is_ feasible.

One glance from the monstrous summons out of those bug eyes swirling with colors convinces him that if it’s feasible, it’ll have to be someone _else_ that pulls it off, because he’s certainly not willing to tangle with it. Still, he stays, because he needs _something_ to report, and because leaving now would be suspicious. He watches as the young Akamichi Clan head _Impresses_ a brown dragonet. As a kunoichi he thinks is called Asuna _Impresses_ a bronze dragonet. And as the young Yamanaka Clan head _Impresses_ the gold queen dragonet.

There’s a pull to the whole thing, undeniable, but nothing to do with him in particular. _Enchanting._ Still, he’s not expecting the last egg to be any different. No reason it should be, after all. But, against all reason, as the shell finally splits open and another brown dragonet tumbles out, he steps forward, drawn against his will at first, then thinking of nothing beyond the dragonet in front of him.

  _*I am Kazuke*_

 _Oh. Oh, oh, oh. It doesn’t matter that Kazuke shouldn’t have been his, doesn’t matter now because he’s Kazuke’s. Irrevocably._ With a start he looks up, realizing that there is _far_ too much attention on him now and… _Oh. Fuck._ His subtle henge has evaporated.

Kakashi Hatake eye smiles at him and gives him a tiny, obnoxious wave. “Iwa could have just _asked_ , you know. We were planning to offer to let candidates from all the villages come.”

Norio is torn between moaning in aggravation and collapsing in relief. It’s amazing that no one managed to strangle the man _before_ they made him Hokage or since he’s retired, but Hatake is someone he wants to tangle with even _less_ than he wants to tangle with the massive blue dragon. At least there’d be a _remote_ chance of surviving the dragon.

 _*Hungry!*_ Kazuke demands imperiously.

“Aaah…” He flails a bit, unsure how to do that, then jumps as someone taps him on the shoulder.

The young Nara head is standing there with a bowl of meat strips in hand and a very dry look on his face. “There’s more against the wall when you need it.”

He flinches slightly, then nods gratefully and takes the bowl, yelping a little when Kazuke’s sharp teeth snap shut on the first piece a little too close to his fingers for comfort. Dealing with political fallout will have to wait for when he has attention to spare from making sure _he_ isn’t part of Kazuke’s meal.

~

_The next batch of dragonets to hatch are…finicky. Three of them don’t like any of the candidates present. Alarmed by this, orders go out from Kakashi to haul in every potential candidate in Konoha. The bronze finds someone quickly enough from the second batch of jounin called in, a man named Utazou. The two browns are not so easily satisfied. Even the genin and Academy kids don’t get a response. Finally someone remembers that the Mist ambassador arrived a few days back and someone goes to fetch him and his entourage._

_The ambassador is passed over as well, but his kunoichi assistant, Satone, gains acceptance from one of the little browns, much to everyone’s relief._

_Hope for the last dragonet is failing rapidly, though. At this point even those who washed out as genin have been brought in, to no avail._

Habana is expecting just a standard courier mission, and indeed, she meets no trouble on the way from Kumo to Konoha, not even a bandit. She has plans to stay overnight in Konoha before taking a return message, if there is any. Of course there’s a possibility of an answer needing to go back sooner, but that’s unlikely.

Needless to say, she’s _not_ expecting the gate guards to look so tense as she hands over the scroll or one to demand, “Come with me.”

Nor is she expecting to be grabbed and shunshinned to a strange looking wooden building on the other side of the village. She starts to demand to know what’s going on before her eyes widen as she sees a huge summons crouched on the other side of the room, with smaller ones being fed in various spots and a lone one laying feebly alone a couple feet away. Startled, she asks involuntarily, “Is that one alright?”

The small (relatively) creature’s head lifts at the sound of her voice and it struggles to get up, falling repeatedly as it tries to get closer. Unable to resist its distress, she kneels in front of it, helping it lift its head.

 _*I am Reito. Hungry.*_ A weak, male voice says into her head.

“He says-” Someone sticks a large basin filled with bloody raw meat strips in front of her nose. “Oh. Thanks.”

She carefully feeds Reito strips of meat, even massaging his throat to help him swallow the first few, and is shocked at how quickly he recovers with the food. Several basins of meat later, she sits back, exhausted, staring at Reito, who is sleepy eyed and bulging with food. A bowl of water is held in front of her and it takes her a few moments to understand and gratefully start to wash the caked on blood off her hands.

Someone chuckles, and she looks up to see that _Kakashi Hatake_ is holding the basin of water for her, looking amused.

“Thank you for coming. The guard told me he didn’t have time to tell you what was going on before he brought you. If you hadn’t come when you did, your dragonet would’ve died for lack of a bond.”

“Reito.” She corrects absently, then blinks as she understands and gives him and then Reito a horrified look. “He would’ve _died!?”_

“Yes. All dragons have this weakness, I’m told. Unfortunate, ne?”

Habana flails tiredly. _Unfortunate!_ Unfortunate doesn’t _begin_ to cover the travesty of so much love being lost to the world so easily. Then her mind snags on the word ‘dragon’. She gives Reito a leery look. He doesn’t look like any conception of a dragon that _she’s_ seen. A look at the big summons proves that the lack of resemblance isn’t just a product of young age. “Dragon?”

Hatake-sama pats her head as if comforting her, which it entirely fails to do. “You’ll need to feed him every couple hours for the first couple weeks. I recommend a bunshin if you can maintain a solid one, for your sleeping hours, otherwise you’ll be _very_ tired.”

“Couple weeks!?”

“Well, of course. He won’t let others feed him and he won’t tolerate being separated from you. Reito is yours now. He’ll be able to go back with you to Kumo in a few months to a year, though.”

“Few months-! A year!” She moans in despair. “How am I going to explain this to Raikage!?”

He pats her head again. “Maa, maa, no need to worry about that. Naruto is writing a letter to him now and there’s a messenger waiting to take it. I’m sure he’ll be pleased that Kumo gets a dragon without having to wait to negotiate terms.”

 _Terms? Gah!_ “Raikage is going to _kill_ me!” She laments in a whine that makes her cringe.

 _*I will eat Raikage if he tries to kill you.*_ Reito offers with sleepy fervor.

Hatake-sama apparently hears this too, because he chuckles again. “No need for that, Reito. She’s speaking metaphorically. At worst she’ll be yelled at and put on D rank chores. But the Raikage is more likely to be pleased than angry.”

Reito opens his eyes more to stare at Hatake-sama for a long moment, before acquiescing, _*If queen rider says so, I will believe.*_

“Queen rider?” Habana asks in puzzlement.

~

Kankuro is _just_ visiting his sister, okay? But Temari insists on dragging both him and Gaara to see the _‘cute little dragons hatch’_ for some reason. Well, okay, dragons are…cool. But damn! That blue one is _huge_ and supposedly it’s the _smallest_ size of what the littler ones will grow up to. He’d honestly rather be nowhere near something with that size fangs and claws. Even if they’re giving him _ideas_ for his next puppet.

Temari was right, though. The baby dragons are stupidly cute as they waddle out of their shells and up to various ninjas, demanding to be fed by _that person alone_. Still, they’d be cuter if they stuck to choosing Konoha ninjas. Like that tagalong of that snot-nosed brat who’d run into him the first time they’d come to Konoha. That’s _two_ of Gaara’s guards so far and… _Oh, kami, no!_ Temari’s going to be insufferable now that one of the dragons has chosen _her!_ Though…at least Temari’s technically part of Konoha now that she’s married to that lazy Nara. Not that it’ll save him from her gloating, of course, but…

He just about swallows his tongue, though, when a gold colored baby dragon toddles up to Gaara and a moment later demands grandly for anyone to hear, _*You may feed me now.*_ That’s his Kazekage she’s ordering around!

 _*I am Bunma.*_ Someone says.

“Uh-huh. That’s nice.” He replies, still staring at his little brother, who seems perfectly content feeding the demanding little dragon.

Something damp nudges his hand, but he’s too appalled to look around.

A throat clearing next to him startles him a little. It’s Iruka, that man who brought the dragons, looking apologetic. “You might want to feed her before she decides your fingers will suffice.”

“What-?” He looks down and his eyes almost pop out of his head as he realizes a green baby dragon is demanding _his_ attention. “Woah! I- Uh- Woah! What do I do?”

 _*Feed. Me.*_ The- No. _His_ dragon demands in an overly patient tone.

“Uh- Uh- Okay. What do I-?”

Iruka shoves an overflowing basin of bloody meat into his hands.

“Ah. Oh. I mean, thank you.”

The man smiles. “One strip at a time, so she doesn’t choke.”

“Right.” _Right. He can do this. Absolutely._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Dragon riders:**  
>  _Ir’ca ‘Umino’, rider of blue Naruth_  
>  Kakashi Hatake, rider of queen Rinze-1st hatch
> 
> Sai Yamanaka, rider of blue Hanshin-2nd hatch
> 
> Chouji Akamichi, rider of brown Enzaburou-3rd hatch (eggs from more than one clutch)  
> Asuna, rider of bronze Shizuaki  
> Ino Yamanaka, rider of queen Tokino  
> Norio (Iwa), rider of brown Kazuke
> 
> Mae, rider of queen Machi-4th hatch (eggs from more than one clutch)  
> Juko (Konoha kunoichi), rider of brown Aoki  
> Tenzo, rider of bronze Yan  
> Utazou, rider of bronze Eito  
> Satone (Mist), rider of brown Osaaki  
> Habana (Kumo), rider of brown Reito
> 
> Temari, rider of bronze Kuuya-5th hatch (eggs from more than one clutch)  
> Yuyako (Suna kunoichi), rider of brown Hansuke  
> Ikusaburou (Suna shinobi), rider of brown Fuuya  
> Gaara (Suna), rider of queen Aihime  
> Kankuro (Suna), rider of green Bunmi  
> Udon, rider of brown Kakejiro  
> Mion (Konoha Genin Corps shinobi), rider of bronze Mitsuyo  
> Tatsue (Konoha kunoichi), rider of brown Kurogane
> 
> (3 eggs left, all from same clutch)
> 
>   _How many name puns did you catch? (cackles) Tired people who have to go an hour early to court hearings in three inches of snow in the next city probably shouldn't be picking names, but hey~ Stress relief?_


	4. The Last Three Eggs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last three eggs from Pern hatch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, who gets the last dragons is supposed to be a bit surprising. Hopefully I've succeeded, but if not, I hope you enjoy anyways. :)
> 
> Credit to SectorDweller for Shinsaku's rice cracker habit.

Shinsaku munches on rice crackers, ignoring the occasional look he gets for it. He gets that dragons are great and wondrous and all that, but quite honestly he’d be a _lot_ more enthusiastic if the eggs had decided to wait another two days to hatch instead of doing it on his first day back from a three month mission of soul-killing drudgery, escorting a merchant who thinks shinobi equals extra servant and pays enough to make it impossible to say no. If the eggs are going to hatch on his first day off and people are going to make him come watch, then they can put up with him indulging in his favorite food. _It’s not like the eggs are going to care._

He watches idly as the middle sized egg rocks more insistently than the others and a hairline set of cracks starts to form near the top on the near side. Reaching for more rice crackers, he encounters only crumbs, scowls into the small bag, and stuffs it into a pocket. Juniichiro had dragged him out of his apartment so fast that he hadn’t had time to grab extra packets. _Some friend he was._

Crossing his arms, he glowers unhappily at the eggs as the middle sized one develops further cracks until it splits oddly, tumbling out a brown dragon hatchling. His scowl softens involuntarily, because awkward baby animals are so clumsy and ugly that they’re adorable, even this one.

Which…now that he notices, is trundling towards him with a slightly alarming speed. Probably aiming for someone behind him, so he makes ready to sidestep hurriedly, because he really doesn’t want to deal with those teeth and claws if it tries to go _through_ him to get to its chosen person.

His sidestep results in the baby dragon trying to copy him clumsily and falling on its front with a painful sounding thud. Reluctantly worried, he squats down and peers at it to see if any damage has been done. The little dragon lifts its head, its bug eyes meeting his, and…

_*Not hurt. Hungry. I am Hougo.*_

Shinsaku stares. This isn’t right. Hadn’t Juniichiro said something about the baby dragons speaking first to the humans they claimed? Whoever this dragon belongs to is going to be _pissed_ at him for getting that ‘privilege’ in their stead.

Hougo’s eyes shift color abruptly, and his tone goes from reassuring-ish to impatient. _*Feed me. I’m hungry.*_

He stares some more. Hadn’t there also been something about no one else was allowed to feed a baby dragon except their chosen human, even if they begged?

The little brown dragon makes a mournful sound. _*Mine. Don’t you like me?*_

_Uh…what?_

Shinsaku twitches as someone taps him on the shoulder. He looks up to find it’s Rokudaime-sama, idly reading one of his obnoxious books as usual when he’s not being serious.

“Maa, maa, what young Hougo is saying is that he chooses you.”

“Wha-? Me? Why? I mean, I’m not from an important clan or anything.”

Rokudaime-sama shrugs and eye smiles over his book. “Mion-san is a career genin, and Mitsuyo chose him. I’m pretty sure dragons don’t choose riders by their social status.”

 _*Hunnnnngry! Feeeeeed meee!*_ Hougo demands, whining now and struggling upright

A basin full of bloody meat strips is shoved into Shinsaku’s hands and he just manages to not drop it in shock. It’s the foreigner who brought the dragons, giving him an amused look. “Dragons decide, riders abide. Go ahead and feed him before he does himself an injury.”

Alarmed at that possibility, Shinsaku straightens enough to start shoving meat strips at the dragon. _His dragon?_

_Hougo? Hougo._

He can figure out the rest later, when thinking too hard won’t endanger the little beast by way of neglect. Because, whining and all, he can’t imagine letting such an affectionate creature suffer or die now. _If he had to compare the feeling, it would be something like coming home from a shitty mission to find that someone had stocked all his cupboards with rice crackers._

_Really, really nice._

_To-kill-for nice._

~

Shikamaru pretends to watch the hatching eggs, but honestly, he’s seen it before. Egg rocks, egg cracks, egg splits open, fugly little dragon stumbles out and is cute at person of choice until fed, person of choice is dazed and blissful once convinced, drops at least half of their other responsibilities in favor of taking care of said fugly little dragon.

 _Okay, **maybe** he’s a little bit resentful that he’s getting almost no attention from his wife, other than being dragged to this **again** and that he’s having to deal with a very confused son who doesn’t understand why his mother doesn’t have as much time for him anymore._ Maybe. Honestly, he’s fairly sure that he’s going to have to give in and make arrangements like Ino did at this point.   _His poor son; his mother hasn’t been the same since his father’s death, but it certainly hasn’t made her **less** bossy. _Shikamaru’s own duties don’t allow enough time to make up for the shortfall in the time Temari normally spends with their son.

Maybe Naruto is envious of ‘Gaara’s good luck’, but Shikamaru sure isn’t. He has a very, very good idea of what hell would land on his shoulders should Naruto’s attention be totally eaten up by a dragon, instead of just being his latest interest. Konoha is still recovering, being the hardest hit of any of the hidden villages, and _no one_ has enough chakra to compensate for the sheer number of shadow clones that Naruto currently has helping run things. Even if he made the maximum number of shadow clones per day, they’d still all die of overwork without Naruto’s contributions.

So instead of watching the eggs, he watches the people who are here as candidates, unwilling spectators, or excited just because, cataloguing their reactions and expressions to amuse himself, because honestly, nothing _else_ about this amuses him at all anymore.

~

Genma watches Shikamaru out of the corner of his eye. _Yup, that’s going to go badly unless someone steps in._ The young Nara has stepped into his father’s shoes as chief strategist, jounin commander, and Clan head seamlessly enough that it almost looks effortless to those who aren’t paying attention. But that doesn’t take into account the sheer number of stressors in the kid’s life. And that when Naras snap, the fallout tends to be bitter and brutal. The kid is _obviously_ not taking having his wife chosen as a dragon rider very well.

People see him complain about troublesome women, and don’t see how much he relies on Temari’s advice and help. They see him bring Shikadai to work with him, and see how supportive a husband and father he is, and don’t see the extra strain it puts on him. Not just in having another distraction to deal with at work, and taking care of his son when he normally does little of the care due to time restraints, but in the fact that Shikadai is taking his mother’s lack of attention personally and isn’t accepting his father’s reassurances that it’s temporary and not because he’s lacking somehow.

They see him not being jealous of Ino and Chouji having dragons and figure that he’s too lazy to want one, not seeing that he’s having to deal with everything else without the advice and support of his best friends.

The second, the smallest, egg splits open with a crack that makes Shikamaru flinch visibly and Genma makes a mental note to see if Sakura can knock some sense into him before something breaks. Konoha can’t _afford_ to have the kid go to pieces and start making bad decisions.

A little green dragonet stumbles out of the shell and toddles towards his side of the room. He tracks its progress idly and hopes to kami that it doesn’t pick Shikamaru, because he’s pretty sure that would _not_ go over well in the kid’s current mood.

So maybe, _maybe_ , he’s surprised enough when the little thing toddles up to _him_ and nudges his stomach by way of a headbutt that almost knocks him off his feet that he spits his senbon out in shock. It’s hardly _his_ fault, though, that it goes off at a weird angle and nearly impales Shikamaru’s foot. Okay, it is, but he didn’t _mean to._

But that’s sort of irrelevant _now_ , because he has _other_ things to worry about. Such as the fact that the green dragonet has apparently decided that she is his. _Or is it the other way around?_ And that he is going to be stuck on a 2hr feeding schedule for the next couple weeks at minimum. And he’s supposed to leave on a mission tomorrow, and actually _needs_ the money it’ll bring in.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck!_

This time the ‘nudge’ is hard enough that it knocks him on his ass. _*Less worrying, more feeding. I am Chiha.*_

_Food. Right._

He looks around and starts to rise, only to be handed a bowl of meat strips by Kakashi, who is wearing a droll expression that says he knows _exactly_ what is going through his head. _Freaking genius._

Genma sits back down and starts feeding Chiha meat strips as fast as she can swallow them. _He supposes he can worry about the other genius strangling him with shadows at another time._

~

Genma’s expression of shock _is_ amusing, as is him spitting his senbon in the wobbliest trajectory Shikamaru’s ever seen outside of civilian-born Academy student. That senbon’s wobbly trajectory coming less than half an inch from impaling his foot is…really not. But he stares at it in surprise for a couple minutes. It’s not the kind of ‘friendly fire’ one expects to encounter from a Kage’s former bodyguard, particularly one who’s guarded the Daimyo in the past and has survived the 4th War. The slight jolt of adrenaline is enough to at least temporarily snap him out of his dark thoughts and mood, and when he’s done staring, he heaves a mental sigh, retrieves the senbon and tucks it in a vest pocket before someone can clumsily step on it or one of the dragons tries eating it. Surly mood or not, that kind of carelessness is not in him.

He lifts his head to watch the last egg, one he’s been told is a queen egg, hatch and lays mental odds on which poor sucker will be stuck with her. All of the gold dragons have had … _interesting_ personalities to date. The gold breaks her shelf and pauses to hiss at it, then looks his direction and…

_*I am Kumori. You will feed me now.*_

_Of course it would freaking be **him**. Because statistically his chances had been under 5% and kami loves fucking with him. _He doesn’t _want_ a dragon on top of his other worries.

The overwhelming pressure of love from the gold is overlaid with distinct impatience. _*Now. We will address your worries when I am not starving. And I am not ‘a dragon’, I am Kumori and you are mine.*_

Shikamaru sighs and slouches towards the wall to get a bowl of meat for her. _Troublesome women._ He sighs again when some random person with blond hair and blue eyes and an envious but brilliant smile hands him _two_ basins of meat. And turns around to slouch back towards Kumori, who is apparently just as lazy as he is and as bossy as his mother is. _What a terrible combination. He truly is cursed._

_*No. You are moping. I am perfect and you are going to love me as I deserve. I will even aid you with your wife and son. And you will teach me that game you are playing in two places in your head.*_

He jolts a little and straightens up. _Why does a dragon want to learn shogi? And how does she intend to help him with Temari and Shikadai? How in the world is he supposed to keep up with his duties **now?** And is this level of lazy healthy for a young dragon? Will it affect her development and abilities? And…_ Wait. How is he supposed to feed her with both hands full?

Shikamaru frowns, then sets one bowl at his feet and gingerly picks a bloody strip out of the other one and holds it out to Kumori, who takes it delicately before wolfing it down and gazing at him expectantly. _Right. She’s not like a human newborn. Faster is better._ He picks out another one and holds it out, this time picking up another immediately as soon as Kumori takes it.

 _This is not how he pictured his day going when he got up this morning. And Temari is going to laugh herself sick before being smug at him._ Troublesome woman.

_*You love her very much.*_

Well, yes. He does. And he supposes that he’ll just have to let the other troublesome woman in his family take over Shikadai’s care earlier than he intended to give in on it.

_*You worry too much. We will solve this in a better way so you will quit worrying.*_

He blinks at Kumori. Well, that’s… Maybe he likes her a little bit after all. Although he’s not sure he can just quit worrying, regardless of the solution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinsaku (Konoha chunin), rider of brown Hougo
> 
> Genma Shiranui, rider of green Chiha.   _Genma’s favorite saying according to wikia is “Less talk, more action.” Chiha has a very similar attitude._
> 
> Shikamaru Nara, rider of queen Kumori
> 
>  ‘to date’- Up until now. So far.
> 
> And yes, that was Naruto who handed Shikamaru bowls of meat strips.
> 
> Edit to previous chapter: Ino’s mother is alive, her father is deceased, so the reference has been changed in regards to who is taking over as Inojin’s main caretaker.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [What Happens When a Bored Troll Gets Stuck in Pern Temporarily](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17543669) by [Foodmoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Foodmoon/pseuds/Foodmoon)




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